Monday, May 23, 2011

Sadhana 2011

Sadhana, a dedicated practice.
It was the final dance recital this week and the year 2010-2011 for dance comes to a close.

I missed my most important and fun part of the recital, getting ready with my friends and chitchatting and laughing and crying. I underestimated the travelling time between my house and the performing stage and I also underestimated the time it would take me to tie my not so long hair anymore, into a bun. I think the precursor to this final rush was rooted in activities throughout the week. During the week I missed my beautician appointment, twice. I couldn’t sew the top that I needed for the show and ended up borrowing from a friend, that covered my muffin top very well but didn’t add anything much other than that. I ended up working overtime when I was planning to take time off from work. I ended up doing my make up in the car while my husband drove me to the performing destination and I ended up rushing to the stage for my first sequence without my ghunghroos (ankle bells).

But in the end it all worked out. I didn’t miss my performance; my sweet friends helped me with final touch ups while treating me like a princess and reprimanding me like a mother. I remembered to smile on the stage, at least part of the time and nobody was hurt in the process of the dramatic back-stage entry or thereafter. A bollywood chick flick kind of a deal :0)

DH was disappointed at the end of the show because my very first sequence was the one I was most excited about it and he missed part of it because of ticket mismanagement and for the other part the lens on the camera wasn’t right to capture good shots. Besides that was the only dance where I was towards the front of the stage and there was enough light to capture a good shot.

As I have been doing all weekend long while I talked to friends and family, at this point I should hand over the phone to DH so that he can explain how I was hiding in the back of the stage and he had a tough time trying to find the window between continuously moving dancers so that he can capture the moment for me. And it is well documented in the pictures as I cropped through many a limb and veils to present a decent picture of me. But like all dark clouds this one had a silver lining too, many of my friends and co dancers were captured in good light, thanks to my Darling Husband.

I would have a few opportunities to perform that particular number again so hopefully next time DH will be able to take good shots. As for me despite all the rush and panic, the performance was an enjoyable experience. The main highlights were the concern and love that my friends hold for me, I felt like the little sister that I never was and there were so many moments that almost brought me to tears, it feels wonderful to be loved and be encouraged and to belong. The other highlight was that I wore a dance jacket that belonged to my guru (Rita ji) many years ago. And it was quite an honor to dance next to some of the wonderfully talented dancers and not feel shortened by the height of their achievement.

I came across this note from July of 2009 and it perfectly sums up wisdom of some of the people that I am surrounded with. “To have the knowledge that I know better and I am going to prove you wrong is so negative. You actually know better when you can forgive another person for not knowing and say yeah, I know better”. My teacher and some of the senior dancers make me feel that way, like its okay to make mistakes and the confidence in me that I’ll learn.

And now after the hustle and bustle of planning and performing, I feel a vacuum that is often felt after the finals week at the end of the semester.

And some pictures:

First Sequence: Vande Matram
The technical dance: Level A

Walking thru woods - peacock

Walk thru woods - Scared of snake

With my girls after the show

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